The following is a brief list of things I’ve learned from over a decade of helping new homeschoolers and homeschool wannabes. They are things you should bear in mind as people come to you for help in beginning their homeschool journey. And if you’ve only just begun yourself? Well, get ready, because as far as others are concerned you are now a homeschooling expert; the questions will come.
Never assume you know it all, because you don’t.
After homeschooling two sons through graduation and working with EHO for more than ten years, I realize now more than ever that I do not know it all and never will. Any mother who has taught two different children likely understands this too. She may think she knows it all when she has no trouble homeschooling the first, but when the second comes along with a totally different learning style and she has to start over from scratch she realizes quickly that she has been mistaken.
There is no one right way to homeschool and you should never imply that there is.
I remember all-too-well how I was just after I discovered unit studies. Anyone talking to me during that period undoubtedly came away with the impression that unit studies were the be-all-end-all and school-at-home was evil. (Okay, so I still have pretty strong feelings about school-at-home.) Had I been truly aware of the importance others placed on my opinions, I would have used a little more care when giving them. I might still have said, “Oh, unit studies are the best thing for us and here’s why,” but I would also have taken time to explain how many other methods are out there and encouraged them to do the research necessary to truly determine what would work for their family. The fact is that, as is true with any trip you may choose to take, there are many paths leading to your final destination and no single path is right for everyone.
Don’t do their work for them.
We live in a hit-me-quick, microwave society and there are a lot of people who have been so well trained by this culture that they will come to you expecting you to give them all of the answers up front. You can’t. You can’t because you don’t have all of the answers and, more importantly, you can’t because it would be the wrong thing for them.
Think of it this way. Your son wants to be an Egyptologist. What do you do? Do you hand him a test, tell him what answers to put where, and say, “Poof, you’re an Egyptologist!”? No, you work out a course of study for him and act as his guide, helping him learn what he needs to know in order to reach his goal. The same holds true for the one who wants to become a homeschooling parent.
You see, when someone decides to homeschool, the first person they must educate is themselves. We all come to homeschooling with preconceived ideas regarding education and, likewise, homeschooling and some of those preconceptions will almost surely be wrong. Too, there are certain basic concepts we must all have time to grasp if we are to be truly successful in our new venture. For instance, I had to learn enough to understand that homeschooling wasn’t just a thing my family and I were going to do, but a lifestyle we would live. If someone had simply handed me a stack of workbooks and said, “Here. Have them work through these and that’s all you need to do,” my kids might have gained some knowledge, but they would almost certainly have had a jaundiced view of homeschooling, and we would all have been much more likely to give up and quit. In other words, the one who tried to make things easier on me by letting me off the hook where my own studies were concerned would have been doing us no real favors.
Recommend some good resources.
Because you want this person to have a balanced view of homeschooling, not taking any one person or resource as their sole means of gaining information, you should have ready a list of helpful resources. Obviously, we consider EHO to be the finest resource on the Internet, but there are many others including email lists, blogs, publisher’s sites, author’s sites, homeschool sites and more. Traditionally published homeschool magazines abound as well, and there are more homeschooling books published every year than you can likely keep up with. Don’t overwhelm the person, of course, but be sure to have plenty of options available so that you can help them decide which would be the best ones to explore first.
Give it to them in bite sized pieces.
When I decided to homeschool, I literally checked out every book the library had to offer (Which, back then, was not so many), bought anything I could find, borrowed copies of all the homeschool magazines I could get my hands on, and studied, studied, studied. Most people aren’t quite the information hog I am, so when you’re helping this newbie enter the world of homeschooling you’ll need to use sound judgment. Be wise when determining how much information to give them at one time. Give them too much and they may well freeze up, not even picking up the first book because the stack is so high. So don’t lend out your whole library, but maybe one or two books. Don’t give them your whole favorite places list from your browser, but limit yourself to the best two or three. ([cough]EHO[cough])
Pray for them.
This is, perhaps, the most important thing you can do for any new homeschooler. While life isn’t nearly as hard on newbies today as it was back when I began, most new homeschoolers are still surrounded by doubting friends and relatives and haunted by their own fears. Pray that God will help them to see what homeschooling is really all about, that they will have a clear understanding of what their own family needs, and that He would give them the courage to follow the right path regardless of how well it fits in with their education-related preconceptions. Pray, also, for their peace and unity in the household. Keep them lifted up before God as they begin this completely new adventure.
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