A Radical New Way to Develop Old-fashioned Relationships
Of Knights and Fair Maidens is a light-hearted, yet serious story of how Jeff and Danielle Myers met, spent time together, courted, and eventually married. Their goal before they were married was to figure out how they could develop a relationship with a person of the opposite sex "in a way that glorifies God and reflects the character of Jesus Christ".
In this book the Myers explain how their relationship was developed in an old-fashioned way - through courtship. Their story is told in the style of an interview with both Jeff and Danielle responding to the "interviewer's" questions and comments.
Of Knights and Fair Maidens guides the reader with ideas to help form the foundation of a solid, Godly relationship. The first few chapters discuss how Jeff and Danielle met and how they each learned about the godly character of the other. They explain why emotions are not as reliable as knowing someone's character, and that "falling in love" should relate to character rather than how handsome or beautiful the other person is.
The next section of the book explains how to fall in love, courtship style. This includes never being alone together (to resist temptation), being accountable to each other's parents, and really getting to know each other through activities, discussions and writing to each other.
The majority of the book explains how and why people should wait until they are prepared for marriage (emotionally, financially, etc) before beginning any relationship. The book goes into great detail, explaining how the guy can get to know a girl's dad, things to know before getting serious, and fun, creative ways to get to know each other and develop character together. The book also includes a wonderful list of 61 questions to help you to know the other person better. The questions are divided into the five most significant categories outside of a relationship with God: Relationship, Family, Money, Time, and Space.
As quoted from the book, "...the attitude of courtship is one of patience and waiting for the Lord's perfect plan...courtship is a smarter, more biblical way to choose a life partner and relate to members of the opposite sex."
I think this book has some wonderful ideas and theories, although the actual implementation of such ideas could be difficult. In today's society, someone undertaking such a commitment might easily be thought of as strange or "out of it". To find someone willing to adapt to such a radical, yet old-fashioned idea, could be a great challenge.
Jeff and Danielle also allude to the idea that short-term dating is self-satisfying and frivolous. They state, "In a dating relationship the guy and girl are not only on their best behavior, but they are also removed from those who really know them, their families". This is one idea with which I have to disagree, as many teenagers and older people are NOT that close to their families. Between school, work, and other activities, it's amazing families spend much, if any, time together any more. I think there is a place for short-term dating, and getting to know members of the opposite sex on a on-to-one basis. This doesn't refer to any sort of physical relationships, but rather refers to the intellectual and emotional sharing that occurs between two people who are alone with each other.
Of Knights and Fair Maidens has some wonderful ideas in it, and while I wouldn't follow it as my "relationships bible", I really enjoyed reading Jeff and Danielle's ideas, thoughts, and suggestions.
The book sells for $8.95 and the Meyers also offer a 45-minute tape. This tape sells for $5.95. Shipping is $3.00 for one item and $1.50 for 2-5 items. |